The hardest part about having fibromyalgia (for me, anyway) is figuring out how to manage my time effectively. It’s impossible to say that I’ll clean up in the garage on Saturday when I have no idea how I’ll be feeling on Saturday. I may have energy, and then again, I probably won’t. It drives my kids nuts, because they are always wanting to fill in their evenings and weekends with fun things to do. “What are we doing this weekend?” is my twelve year old daughter’s favorite question. And I’m sure she thinks I’m the biggest stick in the mud because I always say that I hope we aren’t doing much of anything at all! We live busy lives, and there is rarely a weekend when we aren’t participating in soccer or drumming lessons, hosting youth gatherings at our house on Friday evening, or attending devotions and children’s classes (and many times being the teachers for said classes) on Sundays.
For a young girl it’s hard to understand that Mom would prefer to get up slowly, maybe read a book, put some laundry in the washer, and drink her cup of tea without worrying about who has to be where when. If I had the choice I’d probably become a real homebody with this illness. But because we are always on the go, I have to take my breaks when I can get them.
This week looks like this, and is pretty typical for us.
Monday: Work at the office all day, volunteer 3 hours
Tuesday: Work from home, aquacise class in evening
Wednesday: Work from home, yoga class in evening
Thursday: Work from home, orchestra concert at middle school in evening
Friday: Work at the office all day, host youth gathering at our home in evening
Saturday: Aquacise at 8:15 am, host a study circle in our home (may include feeding them lunch), attend a birthday party for a friend’s son who is turning 16
Sunday: Attend devotions and teach children’s classes, yoga in afternoon
Not to mention all the other things that have to happen everyday, like homework, getting dinner, shopping if needed (usually someone needs to have something special for school the next day that they forgot to mention two weeks ago when they found out they needed it), etc. My husband has decided this week that he will take it upon himself to put our son to bed every night. I usually bathe him, but my husband will take him to his room and read to him and make up stories to tell him and stay with him until he is asleep. My son can fall asleep faster than anyone I’ve ever known, so we’re lucky there. Every night this week he has been in bed asleep by 8:00 pm! It has given me a couple of hours every night to monitor how I’m feeling and handle household chores (or not) at my own pace.
I had a flare up, as I’ve heard other people call them, Tuesday after my first aquacise class. My arms hurt so much I couldn’t fall asleep. I felt pretty good pain-wise on Wednesday, but I was really fatigued and had to change my day to go into the office to Friday so I could stay home and take a nap during my lunch hour. It’s like a juggling act trying to keep on top of all the things that need to get done in a day or in a week or in a month, making sure not to do too much on a good day or else you’ll pay for it the next few days with major pain and tiredness.
Whenever I get a chance I sneak in a nap. I’m not sure if I do this only because I’m tired, or because I want to escape having to think about all there is to think about! I’m still not sure my husband understands completely, because after all, I don’t look sick, right? I know there are times when he’d like to go out and do something spontaneously, like go get a coffee together or catch a movie, but most of the time I have to turn him down because I know that I will pay for it the next day when I’m struggling to stay awake and work.
Does anyone else have any good tips on balancing the demands of life with the demands of fibromyalgia? Please leave a comment or a link if you know of good resources!
